Form: Body & Paper

Though there is plenty of evidence to the contrary, I actually quite enjoy filling in forms. Not sure if it’s because I get to talk about myself (I have a blog, I clearly have a narcissistic bent) or because I rather like processes – but sit me down with a form and I’ll happily fill it in. [The big exception to this rule being a very long form asking very difficult questions which took me all of 6 months to complete!]

I find that sometimes the new year, or fresh starts in general, puts me in a mood to do slightly atypical things…like thinking about becoming a redhead (I go through this phase sporadically but have never actually done it), or getting contact lenses, or changing my entire wardrobe, or finally learning to wear heels…anyway, you get the picture.

This is probably why I find myself in front of my laptop, staring at an application form for a certain TV show. No, not Big Brother or Britain’s Got Talent – but Gok Wan’s baby [am trying to decide whether to write it as an acronym to avoid unwise googling…] HTLGN. Not that I’ll ever get round to sending it off, and really, do I want to appear on TV naked? (It would probably be highly unwise for any future career plans!) 

But, the concept is amazing and the questions on the form are actually quite useful in evaluating your attitude towards your body shape. There are probably few women who would turn down the opportunity to go shopping with Gok – in fact, I bet most would love a gay best friend who could fulfil that role in their life. Who wouldn’t want the chance to change their image, explore new looks in total safety, discover what actually suits them and learn rules about dressing that will stay with them for life?

Maybe a TV show’s not the way to go…? [I can almost hear the cries of “y’think??!” coming back at me!]
Perhaps I need to employ a personal stylist for a day or two? Or perhaps, I could get this all out of my system by having another drastic hair re-styling?

Anyone fancy becoming my own, personal Gok?
Anyone else fancy downloading the application form?
Anyone wondering where the Liz of 2009 has gone and who this alien is in her place?

Daughter of a preacher man

Not only is my Dad a vicar (ok, strictly speaking he’s a minister, but the denominational terminology can get a tad confusing), but his job is to train other people to become vicars. This can lead to amusing stories and incidents – especially as the college is attached to my parent’s home. Last time I visited them back in February, I arrived on ‘how to do a funeral’ day, when they’d acquired a coffin to practise with…

This time, I arrived just after my Dad’s weekly homiletics class (how to preach sermons) in which he had used Gok Wan as an illustration – I kid you not. The sermon was actually entitled ‘how to look good naked’ and was apparently an example of inductive preaching (I can’t give you more of an explanation as I didn’t understand the next part of my parents’ conversation).

I am amazed on two counts. Firstly, that Dad even knows who Gok Wan is (although he is an avid reader of the Guardian’s weekly ‘Ask Hadley’ fashion column). Secondly, that he thought nakedness was a good subject for a sermon. [In case you’re wondering, the Biblical basis had something to do with Isaiah 2, Adam & Eve and Jesus’ nakedness on the cross…]

I’m wondering if my Dad is starting to pay more attention to the world around him than is typical of dusty theologian. His response to my Mum’s compliments on my new curly haired-ness was “I like it – you look like Kate Winslet”, for which comment I will love my father even more than I should. I look nowt like Kate Winslet, but would love to, so he did very well – excellent reference point.

Both these stories just about make up for the fact that on Friday he met me and my mother in a very lovely cafe* in Belfast, walking in clad in a reflective vest and trousers tucked into his socks. We’d have pretended not to know him, except the waitress knew we were expecting someone. I suppose I should be grateful that he’d at least taken his bike helmet off…

*The very lovely cafe is also a beautiful shop full of beautiful things. It’s called Avoca and if you’re ever in the town you should definitely visit.