"Let Mikey Sing!"

If you’d been in the vicinity of my flat on Friday afternoon, or had the misfortune to be travelling on the Jubilee line that evening, you might have heard strains of 90s hits mixed with girlish giggling and the ocassional squeal. Once or twice you might have heard shouts of “Let Mikey Sing” said in rather dodgy Irish accents (“let Moikey sing”).

Who is Mikey?
Why isn’t he allowed to sing?

Every boyband follows a set formula (decreed by God) as to how they will work as a unit. It can’t function without its different parts (it’s a bit like 1 Corinthians 12) and should work as follows:

1) A terribly good-looking, boy next door type. Will sing all main vocals and probably cause the band to break up because of his solo projects.

2) A slightly weedier boy, allowed to do some lead vocals and all falsetto harmonies. Will come out of the closet after the band has achieved mainstream success.

3) Two buff (in a slightly chavvy sense) guys who dance a lot and look rather dangerous. Will usually only sing minimal harmonies. They may also be funny. They will look similar enough for casual observers not to be able to tell the difference between them.

4) One other to make up numbers. No one will remember his name. May have talent, but boys 1 & 2 will prevent him from ever having any lead vocals.

In Boyzone, this 5th member is Mikey, bless him. Only fans of the band would remember his name. He certainly never had a lead vocal on a single, he may have had a short spot on an album track, but I don’t know my sister’s albums well enough to say for sure! Anyway, it was a long-standing joke that he never sang, so on Friday, the “Let Mikey Sing” campaign was launched on the streets of South Bermondsey.

Barely 15mins into the show, Mikey disappeared from the stage part-way through a song. Surely the 3rd night of the tour was too early for a break-up? But no,…he then appeared from beneath the stage playing a piano. Yes, an actual musical instrument, being played by a member of a boyband! How sweet, they were going to let him play along to Words. Wait, where was Ronan? Surely they weren’t going to let Mikey sing? But sing he did, the entire first verse. And thus, the Let Mikey Sing campaign succeeded.

Here’s proof:
(By this point the other boys were singing & Mikey was pushed into the darkness, as the divine order dictates, but you get the idea!)

This is purely gratuitous. They sang When the Going Gets Tough whilst dancing on treadmills and wearing very little. Apart from Mikey, who felt the need to wear a vest. Sometimes the pressure of being the 5th member of Boyzone just gets a little too much!

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